Offering Help.

Substance Use

Reaching out to someone who is struggling with addiction makes all the difference

When we suspect that a friend or family member is frequently using alcohol or other substances, it can be difficult to voice our concerns. We often worry they will take our comments the wrong way or become angry with us. While reaching out can be difficult at first, it could be a life-saving conversation.

So how do you make a difference in a life struggling with substance use?

  • Instead, try to approach them when they are sober or when they have not recently used. When someone is using substances, they may not be aware of what you are saying or may be more guarded than usual.

  • This will only cause the situation to escalate and will likely deter the person from opening up to you. It could also shut off future opportunities to discuss the issue with them.

  • Understand that someone may have difficulty talking about their substance use when they are surrounded by other people or in a public setting. Try to initiate the conversation in a private or semi-private location so the person feels more at ease and does not feel embarrassed or ashamed to talk about what is going on.

  • By communicating this way, you take the focus off the individual and convey that you’ve noticed changes in their functioning. Most importantly, I-statements show that you care. I-statements can be used in many different ways. Here are a few examples of what you could say to someone:

    • We’ve been friends for a while now and I have noticed some differences in you over the last few weeks / months. I don’t want to interfere, but I see that you’ve been drinking/using drugs more frequently. I’m worried about you.”

    • “I couldn’t help but notice that you’ve been consuming more alcohol / drugs recently. Is there something going on that you’d like to talk about? I’m here for you.”

    • “I wanted to check in with you because I noticed you’ve been acting different recently. How are things going at home/work/school?”

  • Pay attention to what someone is saying by making appropriate eye contact, facing the person, and nodding your head when they’ve made a statement. If you are unsure of what they mean by something they’ve said, ask clarifying questions. This is a great way to show you are interested in what they are saying!

  • Validate what they are saying by using phrases such as “I can see why that would make you want to drink/use substances” or “I can tell that this is a difficult time for you. Just know that I’m here to support you.”

  • When talking to someone, do your best to speak in a calm manner and keep your voice at an even tone. Do not be argumentative with the person, even if you disagree with their actions. This will only escalate the situation and may cause the person to become angry or upset.

  • Many people think that what they are feeling will last forever and may not understand that they can recover from their addiction. Let them know that there are many resources available to help them, and encourage them to seek such help if needed.

  • Substance use is a difficult topic and individuals may feel ashamed or upset with themselves. They may also feel embarrassed that someone has noticed their substance use. Realize that talking about this issue is not easy for someone. Though you may want your friend, family member, or co-worker to feel better immediately after talking with you, realize that recovery from substance use is a process. Don’t try to rush someone into feeling better again. Instead, offer them consistent support as they continue to work through their addiction. It may take several conversations or multiple referrals to services before you begin to see noticeable changes in that person.

  • Sometimes a simple word of kindness or checking in with someone on a regular basis can make a world of difference. By asking, “Is there anything I can do?” or “Can you think of something I can do to help you get through this difficult time?”, you allow the person to tell you what is helpful to them. If they are not able to think of something that would be helpful, suggest going on a walk together, helping them make dinner, or simply talking on the phone.

  • If someone is struggling with substance use, it could be helpful to suggest they visit their medical doctor or addiction professional. Let them know that sometimes people need to seek treatment to feel better again. Try to normalize this as much as possible. You could also suggest self-help strategies such as reading books, exercising or finding a local support group if they are not open/able to seek treatment.

Mental Health

Reaching out to someone who is stuggling can be life changing

When it comes to asking someone about their mental health, starting the conversation can be difficult. We often don’t know what to say to someone in psychological pain and may not know what resources are available to assist them. While that initial outreach can be difficult, it is worthwhile—and in many cases, it saves lives.

So how do you make a difference in a life struggling with their mental health?

  • Understand that someone may have difficulty talking about how they are feeling when they are surrounded by other people or in a public setting. Try to initiate the conversation in a private or semi-private location so the person feels more at ease.

  • By using this type of communication, you are taking the focus off the individual and conveying that you’ve noticed changes. Most importantly, I-statements show that you care. I-statements can be used in many different ways. Here are a few examples:

    • “I see that you seem anxious/upset/worried today. Is there something on your mind?”

    • “I have noticed some differences in you recently and wonder how you are doing.”

    • “I wanted to check in with you because I noticed you’ve been pretty upset/anxious/worried recently. How are things going?”

  • Pay attention to what someone is saying by making appropriate eye contact, facing the person, and nodding your head when they’ve made a statement about how they feel. If you are unsure of what they mean by something they’ve said, ask clarifying questions.

  • Validate what they are saying by using phrases such as “I can see why that would made you sad / anxious / etc.” or “I can tell that being in this situation is hard for you. Just know that I’m here to support you.”

  • When talking to someone, do your best to speak in a calm manner and keep your voice at an even tone. Do not be argumentative with the person, even if you disagree with what they say. This is especially helpful in crisis situations because it works to de-escalate a situation.

  • Many people think that what they are feeling will last forever and may not understand that they can feel better. Let them know that there are many resources available to help them get through their difficulties, and encourage them to seek such help if needed.

  • Sometimes a simple word of kindness or checking in with someone on a regular basis can make a world of difference. By asking, “Is there anything I can do?” or “Can you think of something I can do to help you get through this difficult time?”, you allow the person to tell you what is helpful to them verses assuming what they need. If they are not able to think of something that would be helpful, suggest going on a walk together, helping them make dinner, or simply talking on the phone.

  • If someone is struggling with their mental health, it could be helpful to suggest they visit their medical doctor or a mental health professional. Let them know that sometimes people need to seek treatment to feel better again. You could also suggest self-help strategies such as reading books, exercising or joining a local support group if they are not open/able to seek treatment.

  • Realize that talking about mental health is not easy for someone. Though you may want your friend, family member, or co-worker to feel better immediately after talking with you, realize that recovery takes time. Don’t try to rush someone into feeling better again. Instead, offer them consistent support as they continue to work through their mental health issue. It may take several conversations or multiple referrals to services.

Types of Counselors

  • Therapists and counselors are licensed professionals who are trained to give guidance on personal, social, or psychological challenges.

    While they do not prescribe medication to individuals, they are trained to help people cope with mental health issues and change behavior patterns that may be preventing someone from living their healthiest life.

    Therapists can be Licensed Clinical Social Workers (LCSW’s), Licensed Professional Counselors (LPC’s), or Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFT’s).

    If needed, a therapist can refer someone to a psychiatrist or other mental health professional if additional treatment or medication is required.

    Licensed therapists are able to diagnose depending on their local setting and clinical licensure.

  • A psychologist is a licensed professional with a doctoral degree that helps people learn to cope more effectively with life issues and mental health problems. Psychologists may also conduct tests such as those for intellectual skills, personality characteristics, or psychological functioning.

    They also evaluate these tests and are able to offer diagnoses to individuals. Psychologists are not able to prescribe medication in most states.

  • A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who specializes in treating mental health disorders, and is qualified to address the mental and physical aspects of psychological problems.

    Psychiatrists are licensed to prescribe medication for mental health disorders such as anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, or ADHD to name a few.

    People typically seek help from a psychiatrist to identify a mental health disorder and help manage their condition through close monitoring of medication.

  • A medical doctor is a licensed professional who typically treats physical illness and injury.

    However, in addition to the professionals mentioned above, your local physician may also be trained in assessing physical issues that could influence your mental health.

    It is not uncommon for medical doctors to prescribe medication for mental health concerns such as depression or anxiety.

    Medical doctors may also work with or refer to psychiatrists or therapists to address an overall mental health treatment plan.

    In many cases, a local medical doctor is a good starting point in addressing mental health issues.

  • Psychiatric nurse practitioners typically formulate healthcare plans, treat individuals with mental health concerns, and evaluate progress of their patients.

    Depending on the setting, psychiatric nurse practitioners may also offer outpatient counseling services, perform mental health and physical health assessments, prescribe medication, make referrals to other organizations, and educate individuals on health-related topics.

    Typically, a nurse practitioner works in conjunction with a psychiatrist or other medical doctor.

  • Pastoral counselors are trained to assist individuals who are looking for guidance or personal development, and typically incorporate theological concepts into counseling sessions.

    Pastoral counselors could be helpful for those who wish to have spiritual beliefs as part of their recovery from a mental illness or substance use concern.

    Pastoral counselors may include ministers, rabbis, priests, and other such spiritual leaders who have undergone additional training in mental health and/or counseling practices.

  • Peer supporters are people who use their experience of recovery from mental health disorders to support others in recovery.

    Combined with skills often learned in formal training, their experience and institutional knowledge put them in a unique position to offer support. 

    Although they go by many names like peer support specialist or recovery coach, all model recovery, share their knowledge, and relate in a way that have made this evidence-based practice a rapidly growing field.

For more descriptions of mental health providers, please visit Mental Health America’s website at http://www.mentalhealthamerica.net/types-mental-health-professionals.